Our Dynamic System

“We’re part of a dynamic system in which everything and everyone is in process.”

Pema Chodron

Living Beautifully

Interdependence is a word that was introduced to me when I started practicing yoga at OM yoga center in New York City. It was a thread that could be found in almost every class, regardless of teacher or class level. The idea that, not only are we attempting to find our own way through this life and doing the best we possibly can with the tools at our disposal, but that we are inextricably linked together, and the actions I choose (or don’t choose) have an effect on the rest of this system. My choices have direct effect on my personal and professional relationships in how trust is built, accountability is maintained, and mistakes are compassionately held. My choices also have an effect on the person I don’t know well, that I may have a brief conversation with or that I may pass by. 

Connection, as Brené Brown writes, is a fundamental human driver. We want a tribe. We want to feel belonging even if it is at the detriment of others or ourselves. We want to feel seen, valued and loved by those we see, value and love. This can be challenging when so much of our experience settles into the online communities. Connection can be made online, but it feels different than being with people. When we sit in the same room as another person we derive so much information from their body language, their tone, the unfiltered space from their eye ball to our eye balls, their overall energy of being present or perhaps being distant or defensive. It is from these cues we can act in the most informed capacity, and allow for consequences to arise. 

We grow well when nourished. It can feel selfish, lazy and counterproductive but it’s important. We grow well when around others who stimulate and inspire us. We grow best when we engage in this dynamic system fully, with appropriate boundaries and a deep understanding of human error and misperception so that we can be kind and hold space for the experiences of others. 

We are a part of the ecosystem of Earth, of the Milky Way, of the entirety of what we assume is out there. If a butterfly flapping its wings in London can cause a tsunami in the Pacific Ocean, our actions on Earth must cause an effect into the unknown dark space we haven’t any information about. 

We ourselves are also an ecosystem: a brilliant combination of physical, psychological, emotional, spiritual and experiential complexities that grow and manifest throughout our years of consciousness. We must allow the growth, the aging, the accrual of wisdom so that we can fully connect and participate in the interdependence. We have to be okay to ask for relationships, ask for contact, and ask for space to be alone. We have to communicate what we need to be fully interdependent within this dynamic system and allow others to show up in their needs as well. We have to meet each other where we are at, adapt to the combined needs of the communal members and then be curious about those who show us were growth is possible. 

We are a part of this system, we must acknowledge its presence and its power in how it effects us and we affect it. We are one tribe. We are all members.